Showing posts with label fatherhood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fatherhood. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Empowerment through education

Best of Luck with this continuing venture from London to Chatham Dave. Your passion for change has and will continue to assistant men and women who are bewildered by the archaic, expensive, dysfunctional, and gender biased Family Law System.  It's major beneficiaries are  lawyers, whose pockets get lined with cash on the backs of our children's financial legacies and keeps incompetent Family Law Judges employed to perform negative social engineering on our children.MJM


Not All Dads are Deadbeats

BOB BOUGHNER

The Daily News


A free educational workshop sponsored by Not All Dads are Deadbeats (NADAD) will take place Tuesday at the Chatham Central Public Library.

Dave Flook of Chatham, founder and president of the organization, stressed it is not just a men's organization - "it's an equal parenting group.''

Flook, who recently moved to Chatham from London to be closer to his daughter, said there is a huge demand in Chatham-Kent for services offered by his group, which is designed to help those affected by divorce and separation.

"We are a community oriented support group for proud parents who have been systematically removed from their children by the Canadian family court system,'' he said.
Flook said Tuesday's hands-on, interactive workshop will be the first of many educational events scheduled throughout 2010.

He said the workshops are focused on providing the practical skills needed to combat court injustice.

"They also offer real world solutions to the growing problems of gender bias in the courts, radical feminist agendas and government and institutional corruption.

"Tuesday's event will be an interactive workshop and participation in the proceedings will be strongly encouraged,'' he said.

A former professor of graphic design at Fanshawe College, Flook is in the process of establishing a web design studio in Chatham.

Flook said he created NADAD to reach out to others who have had their roles as fathers revoked by the state.

"There is no reward for complacency,'' he said. "Our children need us now to fight for them and to ensure they do not become fatherless.''

The workshop takes place from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. Tuesday at the Chatham library, 120 Queen St., Chatham.


bboughner@chathamdailynews.ca.


Wednesday, September 16, 2009

In OZ ~ Because Lying in the Family Court is Child Abuse


Wednesday, September 16, 2009
By Amfortas

The Chief Justice of the Family Court of Australia, Diana Bryant, has recently launched an extraordinary attack on Australia’s internationally regarded 2006 Family Law amendments, by writing to the Attorney-General and asking him to urgently repeal important provisions within the amendments.

According to Ash Patil, President of shared parenting group Fathers4Equality, “These provisions in the family law act were specifically implemented to reduce the epidemic of false allegations and parental alienation that permeate every corridor of the Family Law Courts, to the clear detriment of the innocent children caught in the cross-fire.

But Bryant wants them removed, and fails to explain how the innocent victims of maliciously false allegations would be protected without them.

James Adams adds, “What is more astonishing it seems is that unlike the parliamentary committee that recommended these laws in the first place, the Chief Justice has not consulted widely before making such an extraordinary intervention (in fact she has not consulted with any fathers’ groups at all).

Rightly or wrongly, Bryant will now be perceived to have compromised views on this issue, denying her the opportunity to have played a unifying force in the process of family law reform in this country, much like the wasted opportunities of her predecessor.”

The two provisions Bryant wants specifically removed include:

*the order of costs, at the Judge’s discretion, against a parent who has been proven to have “knowingly” made false allegation in Court,

and

*unspecified actions, at the Judges’s discretion, against a parent who has purposely alienated or deliberately maligned the children against the other parent.

The importance of these provisions Patil explains. ”These provisions have been specifically implemented to reduce the disturbingly common practices by some separated parents in making contrived and sinister allegations in Court against the other parent, and to otherwise engage in concerted efforts to destroy the relationship between the child and the other parent. This is done knowing full well the children will be irrevocably harmed in the process, both psychologically and emotionally.

Yet it goes on and will continue to go on given human nature, unless we have laws to help it stop.

“So these are ‘good’, modest provisions designed to stop misguided parents from misusing the system and abusing innocent children” were introduced only after extensive community consultation.

According to Adams “These provisions were agreed to by a bi-partisan parliamentary committee (both Labor and Libs/Nats) that went around Australia canvassing the views of all Australians for over two years.

Finally this committee was so appalled at the extent of institutional abuse in the Family Court that it recommended measures to protect innocent children and parents who were victims of contrived allegations and parental alienation by spiteful ex-partners.

” But Bryant wants to override the will of the Australian people and the will of Parliament, and to completely remove all disincentives against lying in the Family Court.

Really soft penalty for a very serious crime.

Patil, who claims that many F4E members are subjected to false allegations, states that “Proving that someone has ‘knowingly’ made false allegations rather than ‘mistakenly’ or ‘recklessly’ is quite a tall order. The standard of proof in these matters is a very tough hurdle to pass, and as a result ‘knowingly false’ allegations have only been proven in a relatively few cases in recent years.

If they are proved, they may result in a costs order, although this has been rarely applied in children’s matters by the judiciary. “Now given that perjury in any other Australian court may result in 10 years or more jail time, one must be mindful of the fact that this is a really soft penalty for a very serious crime.

It is a provision however that can work as a disincentive, albeit a modest one, in dissuading many parents from lying in the Family Court in the first place.” So these are “good”, modest provisions designed as a disincentive to those misguided parents who may in a moment of weakness be tempted to make contrived allegations in Court.

Measured responses to issues of concern Patil and Adams are frustrated by the logic used by the Chief Justice, and Patil adds that “Bryant justifies the need for these changes by suggesting that some people have misunderstood these provisions.

Even if this is true, her suggested fix is a remarkable over-reaction to an issue that could be addressed through a number of simple measures.” “Given that most parents in family law proceedings are either represented by lawyers, have visited a family relationship centre or have sought government funded legal services, a simple review could identify the cause of this misinformation from within these service providers, and provide an opportunity for corrective measures to be implemented.”

Adams wonders why the Chief Justice needs to throw the baby out with the bathwater, and opines that “a request to the Attorney General to implement an educational campaign to educate parents about these provisions would go a long way in addressing any existing misconceptions, and would be a more measured and effective approach to the issue at hand.”

Adams continues “Given the unprecedented nature of these family law amendments, what is required are sensible, well-measured & ultimately timely approaches to these issues, in order to allow for proper outcomes based research to develop. Anything less than this would put at risk the very wellbeing of those we are trying to protect.”

Broader consultations as a first step Fathers4Equality would like to encourage the Chief Justice to put some thought into what checks and measures she would alternatively suggest be implemented, if the current provisions are removed, to protect children from the devastating damage resulting from alienation and perjury in Court.

Given that lying in the Family Court and parental alienation are forms of child abuse, we stress the importance of carefully considering the implications to the welfare of children if these safeguards are removed.

Secondly and in reference to a recent campaign that has promoted a less than accurate reflection of these new laws, we would ask the Chief Justice to consider making a public statement to the effect, as is the case, that no evidence exists of any escalation of child abuse as a result of the new amendments.

This would be an important statement from the Chief Justice in the interests of an informed community discussion on this matter, and would help ensure that the debate is discussed in terms of facts, not innuendo.

Finally, we would like to draw attention to the increasingly under-resourced and overworked child protection authorities in this country, and the fact that too many cases of genuine abuse are not thoroughly investigated, in part because of the level of false allegations emanating from the Family Court.

It must be recognised that for every hour that a child protection officer is investigating a false allegation, it is one hour less protection that can be given to a child in genuine need, and this is a cost that the children of Australia simply cannot afford. Fathers4Equality would be open to discussing these important issues further with the Chief Justice, if she is willing to accept our invitation.

Amfortas is a Psychologist and Men's Rights Advocate living in Tasmania; the mania inflicted by Feminist-Socialism. He is the Past-Chairman of mensnewsdaily.com Ask, Who Does the Grail Serve. | More from Amfortas

Monday, September 14, 2009

Dads get help in this family program




Peel: Program received grant for support into 2010

Article Last Updated; Monday, September 14, 2009
Camaraderie mixes with angst as five men sit around a rectangular table, discussing their subject of mutual distress.

One of the men has rambled on for several minutes, first telling his good news about recent job advances, then launching into a somewhat troubling review of his recent dealings with his estranged wife. Abruptly he realizes he's hogging the spotlight. He stops his tirade and smiles.

Audio by John Peel

Interview with Kate Jones


Download MP3

For more info

For more on the Promoting Responsible Fatherhood initiative, call Advocacy for La Plata at 375-1433.

For information about fatherhood, visit the Colorado Dads Web site atwww.coloradodads.com.

"Thank you," Richard Dilworth tells the group. "I feel better. ... This place has been a godsend."

This is the weekly meeting of the Promoting Responsible Fatherhood initiative, a unique program with a goal of keeping fathers involved in their kids' lives, no matter what their relationship with the mother becomes.

Social workers often witness a vicious cycle in custody cases: The father can't make a child-support payment and believes, or is told - erroneously - that he no longer can see his child. Once he loses touch with the child, he loses incentive to make payments.

"So many guys don't even know they have rights," says Kate Jones, who coordinates the program. "They assume since the mom gave birth to the child, she has all the rights."

The initiative is run by Advocacy for La Plata, a Women's Resource Center program headquartered above United Blood Services in Bodo Industrial Park. If sometimes these men feel like the blood is being squeezed out of them, at this meeting they know they're not alone. Not all estranged fathers, after all, are deadbeat dads.

"That's the big myth," Jones says. "There are (deadbeat dads). Just like there's deadbeat moms."

Almost all the fathers are voluntary participants, says Eve Presler, program director for Advocacy for La Plata. That's important because of the dads' buy-in. They're more likely to trust program workers and remain committed than if a court has ordered them to show up, she says.

It's a chance to get together with like-minded guys, Jones says, and they're also lured by the free pizza and pop.

Along with group facilitator Jason Spoo, a graduate of the program, the four men share their victories and frustrations and advice. The subjects vary, but one theme is consistent: None of the four is getting the desired access to their children.

Morgan Abbey, for example, last saw his son 33 days ago. The boy now is in Nebraska, and Abbey is in the process of trying to get visitation rights.

Jim Drumstas' two children spent part of the summer in Southwest Colorado, but they've gone back to Maine with their mother. Lawyers are involved, but from Drumstas' perspective, progress is slow and uncertain.

The 16-week-long sessions include instruction in various aspects of fatherhood. They learn about child behaviors, nutrition and relationship skills.

The Promoting Responsible Fatherhood initiative is not just the group meetings. Caseworkers deal individually with the fathers, helping them find jobs, going to court with them as advocates. Since its inception 2½ years ago, the initiative has served 150 fathers, about 96 percent of whom do not have custody.

Presler is excited that a recent $50,000 state grant will fund the program through at least September 2010. She's a big believer in fathers' rights. She's worked to decorate the walls with pictures of fathers and their kids; doctors' offices, she says, are notorious for having pictures only of mothers with kids.

In the meeting room, there's a poster on the wall titled, "Every Girl Every Boy." It's a list of myth-busters concerning men and women. One of the lines says:"For every girl who is tired of acting weak when she is strong, there is a boy tired of appearing strong when he feels vulnerable."

There's some macho-ness in the room, for sure, and they manage to joke about their serious issues, but the feelings are real. These men are sad, mad and stressed out. They need help, and they know it.

"They're very proud of what they've overcome," Kate Jones says. "These are the guys who want to be the best dads. And they typically end up being the best dads."

johnp@durangoherald.comJohn Peel writes a weekly human-interest column.

http://durangoherald.com/sections/Features/Columnists/John_Peel/2009/09/14/Dads_get_help_in_this_family_program/